I want to stay that way.
Salvation isn’t something I seek because the owing for loss of innocence never was needed.
The outer shell must fall and reveal the sanctum of what we believed is diety truly is our fear and pain manifest in imagined salvation we never had nor will have when in all proof there is no salvation only the suffering we must learn to love and be content in.
What a bunch of hot air that was.
Damn, be happy with what you have. Embrace pain and discomfort, smile and conquer the world.
Anyway, who the hell do I think I am?
I want to be a cowboy of the wild west of soap boxes(And, maybe a little bit of making sense.)
To embrace the innermost being, that is the question. Can we do it? Or, is it all an illusion to trick our conscience into believing that most of the crap we see in the world is worth a second of our time.
To me, most everything is anathema, an abomination, hated dreck except the real primal love deep in my rotting blood. In this I mean love. Real, honest love. The kind to find staring back at you in the eyes of your child, your parents, and if you’re fortunate your partner.
If you are extremely fortunate you may even find this phenomenal affection with a friend.
Then there are those souls who can find this love and express it with strangers and that is beyond exceptional.
This is the crux. Strive for it. I think we all have a rare moment when this kind of grace touches us or we give it. Think of those that give it most of their lives.
Work for that. It’s difficult for me. I’m working for it. Being nice and having empathy, that is top level.
So, I’m damned and it’s okay because in a little patch sitting in my skull is a scintilla, a tiny spark firing up, pointing me toward being a bit nicer every day. And, still, I fail a lot.
Some days my pointer is broken and at other times it’s right on target. Most of my teeth are straight but I have a couple of crooked ones due to me never wearing braces. My thoughts and actions are like that too.
