Finding the self-talk to get through the day.
The next moment is filled with great danger. I’m about to roll out of bed and begin today but there’s no guarantee I have the courage, stamina, and will to accomplish the many tasks on my agenda. The voice in my head goes through the list and a smaller voice filled with “What ifs?” pokes in its - every day -harsh cynical rake on my conscience.
Sun is peeking its face through the shade slats covering my bedroom windows and I know I must face the day. My wife and two children count on me. I can’t let them down. Have to do my part. The sinking flesh fighting me to stay in bed presents a worthy foe.
The battle begins with deep breaths fading into concentration.
I sink into meditation. “Today is a new day. I will face my fears. It’s up to me. No one is going to do my work for me.” The flash of my schedule ticks off before my deep breaths like a movie and I project accomplishing my goals for every waking moment.
Innerspeak rings in my thoughts, “I will be productive.” Opening my eyes is like coming up for air from a deep dive in a thick abyss. The smile crossing my lips feels unforced and it crosses my mind I may be tricking myself into a positive mindset.
